"If I Were President: What I'd do for Seniors"
by Ron LeGrand
It's a shame...
A senior spends a lifetime getting wise and then no one wants to listen.
What a waste.
The first thing I'd enact is a hiring program for seniors who want to work. We have it for minorities, why not seniors?
They show up on time, focus on the job, and don't spend all day on the phone. They won't get pregnant and they understand the right to work is a privilege, not something forced on them.
They work cheap just to stay busy. Many have been in business for themselves and know what its like so they can relate to why the owners actually expects productivity for a paycheck.
Put em to work, don't force them to quit at the best educated part of their lives.
Next, I'd make sure no one screws with social security, Medicare or Medicaid.
Take the money from the welfare system if necessary. Put those lazy parasites to work and we won't have to support the baby factories who suck the life out of any economy.
I'll enact the Utilize Our Seniors program where we pay them to teach life skills to the welfare society and teenagers.
The seniors can teach the kids how to handle money, balance a checkbook, negotiation skills, and a lot more things learned from a lifetime of living.
NEW LAW! Once you hit 65, drug companies will be required to supply you with any prescription you need at 50% off, insurance companies must eat any copay and pay the 50%. Drug stores may make only 10% markup. They can make it up on the Geritol.
The government will guarantee the top 50% of a loan to open a business for a senior and subsidize a low rate. This will make it easy for banks to loan the money with a 10% down payment.
Sales tax will be eliminated for all over 65, and property tax will be reduced by 10% for all seniors and not exceed 1% of the assessed value in any state. All municipalities must offer a 12-month payment plan on taxes for seniors
All seniors who need nursing home or hospice after 75 will be paid by the government as long as they have less than one million dollars in liquid assets or two million in equity in personal or real property and haven't transferred in the past three years.
Grocery stores, restaurants and drug stores must grant all seniors a 10% discount on anything in the store. It's now mandatory.
Ok that's it for now, but I bet I'll have no trouble getting the senior vote. Crap, I am one of them!
